Those hands look bored.. I got something they can work on.
What time do you get off? Can I watch?
Are you a mirror? Cause I can see myself inside you.
May i pleasure you with my tongue?
I’d like to get between your legs and eat my way straight to your heart…
Mines bigger than his want proof?
Baby, I’m no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your Bedrock!
You have some nice jewelry. It would look great on my nightstand.
You, me, handcuffs, and whipped cream: interested?
You know, I would die happy if I saw you naked just once!
If i were a planet I’d want to be Neptune so I can be right behind Uranus.
My bed is broken. Can I sleep in yours?
Excuse me, do you believe in one night stands?
Are you a pirate? Cause I’ve got a lot of semen waiting for you!
The FBI wants to steal my pen. Can I hide it inside you?
Are you a button? Cause I’d tap that.
How about you let me clap them cheeks tonight?
Do you know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie-pop?
My face is leaving in fifteen minutes. Be on it.
Let me eat you for an hour. If you don’t want to have sex after that, we won’t.
Wasn’t I supposed to eat you somewhere?
You can call me mufasa cause I really want to lion you.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put my dick in your mouth.
Miss, If you’ve lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?
You know, if I were you, I’d have sex with me.
Wanna play Army? I lay down and you blow the hell outta me.
Let’s just fuck.
My recipe for love is one cup of you, one cup of me, knead till hard, and serve hot.
Pick a number between 1 and 10. You lose now take off your clothes.
You’re thicker than a snicker.
I’m like Domino’s Pizza. If I don’t come in 30 minutes, the next one is free.
Did you get those pants at 50% off? Cause they are 100% off at my place!
You know how some men buy really expensive cars to make up for certain shortages? Well, I don’t even own a car.
Damn, are you my new boss, because you just gave me a raise.
You are so selfish! You’re going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night.
Did you fell from heaven? Cause your booty is swollen!
There are 265 bones in the human body. How would you like one more?
Do you sleep on your stomach? [No] Can I?
Call me Chris Brown, cause I’d hit that! [Look at her ass]
Will you marry me for just one night?
They say a kiss is the language of love. Wanna have a conversation?
How about we play lion and lion tamer? You hold your mouth open, and I’ll give you the meat!
I don’t know what you think of me, but I hope it’s X-rated.
Are you in to Casual Sex or should I dress up?
What’ll you say we make like Winnie-the-poo and I can get my nose stuck in your honey jar.
Nice fucking weather. Want to?
Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
Is it cold in here, or are you just happy to see me.
Are you a horse? (No) Can I ride you anyway?
I’m jealous of your heart because it’s beating inside you and I’m not.
Would you f*ck a stranger? – No?! – Then let me introduce myself, my name is ____
Hi. I’m an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus.
I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?
Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? (No.) Do you want to go upstairs and talk?
Are you flappy bird? Cause I could tap you all night
Let’s bypass all the bullshit and just get naked.
I wanna do dirty things with you – like farming.
Do you know your ABC’s? Cause I wanna give you the 4th letter of the alphabet.
That’s a nice shirt, can I take you out of it?
Hey baby, I think you just made my two by four into a four by eight.
Hello, love, do you spit or swallow?
Gee, that’s a nice set of legs, what time do they open?
Person #1: hey, you wanna do a 68? Person #2: What? Person #1: You go down, and I’ll owe you one.
So what are you doing for sex later?
your ass is pretty tight, want me to loosen up?
Do you have planet insurance? Because I’m about to destroy uranus.
Hey cutie, wanna go halves on a baby?
What is long and hard, and right behind you?
Damn girl, are you a pinata? Cos i’m gonna need a blindfold before i hit that.
If I’m a pain in your ass… We can just add more lubricants.
If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock!
Nice tits, mind if i feel them?
Just to let you know I eat the booty like groceries
Damn girl I’d love to kiss those beautiful, luscious lips. And the ones on your face.
Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pull your pockets inside out….) Would you like to?
Are you a farmer? No, ‘cuz you sure know how to raise a cock.
I’ve got a condom with your name on it.
I’m hard. You wet?
Does your ass
Hey baby, let’s go make some babies.
Hi. I’m horny.
I’m peanut butter, you’re jelly, let’s have sex.
Are you a virgin? (No.) Prove it!
Your so hot I could roast my meat on you, baby.
Can I put my Charlie in your Chocolate Factory?
Hey baby, what’s your sign? Caution, slippery when wet, dangerous curves ahead, or yield?”
My ex-girlfriend used to call me Goldfinger.
Let’s have a party and invite your pants to come on down.
Were you born in a toilet? Because your the shit!
Sex is a killer … want to die happy?.
Do you wanna see why my nickname is ‘tri-pod’?
[Take an ice cube to the bar, smash it, and say] “Now that I’ve broken the ice, will you sleep with me?”
My friend and I made a bet and I need to check if those are implants.
You know why I am like a squirrel? Cause I want to bury my nuts in you.
So, what are the chances of my balls slappin’ your ass tonight?
You got nice breasts, but what color are your nipples? Brown or Pink?.
Are you chinese? Cus’ id play with your chopstick
Ay gurl is yo dad in jail? Cuz if i was your dad, i’d be in jail.
Roses are red, grass is green, you should come to the crib and fuck the team!
Looks don’t matter, I’ll just wrap you in a flag and fuck you for glory.
I’m on fire. Can I run through your sprinkler?
First, I’d like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then, I’ll move up to your belly button.
Can I impregnate you with my Demon spawn?
Wanna fuck like bunnies?
Can I please be your slave tonight?
Male: Hey, I don’t feel to good. Female: Why? Male: I feel like I have an elephant in my stomach. Female: What? Male: (looking down) I think his truck is already sticking out.
Hey, are you hiring? I really need a blowjob.
Do you wanna lick my tongue?
Show me your pussy!
Hey I am a wrestler, let me take you down.
If you talk to me, I’ll fuck you.
I can sense that you’re a terrific lover, and it intimidates me a little.
You look familiar, have we had sex before?
Have you ever played “Spank the brunette”? Want to try?
Hey baby, will you be my love buffet so I can lay you on the table and take what I want?
Let’s not mess with nature. We are here to make babies. So, let’s get to it.
I’ll show you my tan lines if you show me yours.
I’ve got a hummer and a vibrator. Which one do you want to test drive first?
Are you free tonight or am I gonna have to pay?