Those hands look bored.. I got something they can work on.
My bed is broken. Can I sleep in yours?
What time do you get off? Can I watch?
Are you a mirror? Cause I can see myself inside you.
Wanna play Army? I lay down and you blow the hell outta me.
May i pleasure you with my tongue?
Mines bigger than his want proof?
Did you get those pants at 50% off? Cause they are 100% off at my place!
Baby, I’m no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your Bedrock!
You have some nice jewelry. It would look great on my nightstand.
Look at my lips and your lips. They want to massage each other.
You know, I would die happy if I saw you naked just once!
Excuse me, do you believe in one night stands?
Are you a button? Cause I’d tap that.
If i were a planet I’d want to be Neptune so I can be right behind Uranus.
Let’s just fuck.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put my dick in your mouth.
My face is leaving in fifteen minutes. Be on it.
Let me eat you for an hour. If you don’t want to have sex after that, we won’t.
Do you know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie-pop?
I’m like Domino’s Pizza. If I don’t come in 30 minutes, the next one is free.
Wasn’t I supposed to eat you somewhere?
You can call me mufasa cause I really want to lion you.
Miss, If you’ve lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?
Are you a pirate? Cause I’ve got a lot of semen waiting for you!
Are you a farmer? No, ‘cuz you sure know how to raise a cock.
The FBI wants to steal my pen. Can I hide it inside you?
How about you let me clap them cheeks tonight?
You know, if I were you, I’d have sex with me.
My recipe for love is one cup of you, one cup of me, knead till hard, and serve hot.
You are so selfish! You’re going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night.
Damn, are you my new boss, because you just gave me a raise.
You, me, handcuffs, and whipped cream: interested?
You know how some men buy really expensive cars to make up for certain shortages? Well, I don’t even own a car.
Do you know your ABC’s? Cause I wanna give you the 4th letter of the alphabet.
You’re thicker than a snicker.
Pick a number between 1 and 10. You lose now take off your clothes.
Do you like jigsaw puzzles? Let’s go to my room and put our pieces together.
Did you fell from heaven? Cause your booty is swollen!
Do you sleep on your stomach? [No] Can I?
There are 265 bones in the human body. How would you like one more?
Call me Chris Brown, cause I’d hit that! [Look at her ass]
They say a kiss is the language of love. Wanna have a conversation?
How about we play lion and lion tamer? You hold your mouth open, and I’ll give you the meat!
Are you in to Casual Sex or should I dress up?
What’ll you say we make like Winnie-the-poo and I can get my nose stuck in your honey jar.
Nice fucking weather. Want to?
I don’t know what you think of me, but I hope it’s X-rated.
I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?
Is it cold in here, or are you just happy to see me.
Will you marry me for just one night?
Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
Are you a horse? (No) Can I ride you anyway?
I’m jealous of your heart because it’s beating inside you and I’m not.
Would you f*ck a stranger? – No?! – Then let me introduce myself, my name is ____
Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? (No.) Do you want to go upstairs and talk?
Gee, that’s a nice set of legs, what time do they open?
Hi. I’m an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus.
Let’s bypass all the bullshit and just get naked.
I wanna do dirty things with you – like farming.
That’s a nice shirt, can I take you out of it?
Are you flappy bird? Cause I could tap you all night
Damn girl, are you a pinata? Cos i’m gonna need a blindfold before i hit that.
Hey baby, I think you just made my two by four into a four by eight.
Hello, love, do you spit or swallow?
Person #1: hey, you wanna do a 68? Person #2: What? Person #1: You go down, and I’ll owe you one.
If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
So what are you doing for sex later?
Hey baby, let’s go make some babies.
What is long and hard, and right behind you?
Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pull your pockets inside out….) Would you like to?
I have a 13 inch dick. Remember that, there will be an oral exam later.
I’m hard. You wet?
Brrr! My hands are cold. Can I warm them in your heaving breasts?
your ass is pretty tight, want me to loosen up?
Nice tits, mind if i feel them?
Just to let you know I eat the booty like groceries
I’d like to name a multiple orgasm after you.
Hey cutie, wanna go halves on a baby?
I’d like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feed bag.
Hi. I’m horny.
I’d really like to see how you look when I’m naked.
I’m not an expert in hardware, but I know that you’d be able to screw my nuts off.
I’ve got a condom with your name on it.
Damn girl I’d love to kiss those beautiful, luscious lips. And the ones on your face.
I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock!
If I’m a pain in your ass… We can just add more lubricants.
Do you have planet insurance? Because I’m about to destroy uranus.
Does your ass
Hey baby, what’s your sign? Caution, slippery when wet, dangerous curves ahead, or yield?”
I’m peanut butter, you’re jelly, let’s have sex.
Your so hot I could roast my meat on you, baby.
Are you a virgin? (No.) Prove it!
Can I put my Charlie in your Chocolate Factory?
Do you wanna see why my nickname is ‘tri-pod’?
My ex-girlfriend used to call me Goldfinger.
Let’s have a party and invite your pants to come on down.
Can I please be your slave tonight?
Were you born in a toilet? Because your the shit!
My friend and I made a bet and I need to check if those are implants.
[Take an ice cube to the bar, smash it, and say] “Now that I’ve broken the ice, will you sleep with me?”
You know why I am like a squirrel? Cause I want to bury my nuts in you.
So, what are the chances of my balls slappin’ your ass tonight?
Sex is a killer … want to die happy?.
Are you chinese? Cus’ id play with your chopstick
Ay gurl is yo dad in jail? Cuz if i was your dad, i’d be in jail.
Roses are red, grass is green, you should come to the crib and fuck the team!
Looks don’t matter, I’ll just wrap you in a flag and fuck you for glory.
Wanna fuck like bunnies?
Can I impregnate you with my Demon spawn?
Male: Hey, I don’t feel to good. Female: Why? Male: I feel like I have an elephant in my stomach. Female: What? Male: (looking down) I think his truck is already sticking out.
First, I’d like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then, I’ll move up to your belly button.
Wow! Are those real?
You got nice breasts, but what color are your nipples? Brown or Pink?.
I’m on fire. Can I run through your sprinkler?
Show me your pussy!
Do you wanna lick my tongue?
If you talk to me, I’ll fuck you.
Have you ever played “Spank the brunette”? Want to try?
Hey baby, will you be my love buffet so I can lay you on the table and take what I want?