I’m bigger and better than the Titantic – only 200 women went down on that vessel!
If I jumped on your back, would you beat me off?
If I can’t buy you a drink, at least let me fix your laptop.
I want you to have my children (pause) GREAT! They are in the car outside..
I would absolutely love to swap bodily fluids with you.
I’d drag my balls through a mile of broken glass, followed by a mile of hot coals, just to chase a laundry truck that MIGHT have your dirty underwear on
I’d rip out both my eyes just so you have more holes to screw me in
I wanna floss with your pubic hair.
I wanna live in your socks so I can be with you every step of the way.
Hi, do you speak English? (yes.) Oh, me too.
Hi, I have big feet.
Hi, I’m a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead?
Hey baby, as long as I have a face, you’ll have a place to sit.
Hey baby… you got any diseases? Want some?
Find a girl at the bar, walk over to her, and say “you put the ‘hot ass’ in my shot glass.